Begin again

I'm so over life right now. The same, tediousness every single day. Wake up, work, dinner, bed and repeat.

I'm tired of being treated like crap and have been told to change feeling this way, I need to cut out the shitty people that surround me. Tough to do when they're family.

The holidays are here. Usually my favorite time. I'm not excited. I'm kind of wishing we'd all get snowed in on the days we're supposed to gather together.

I'm not jealous of my sister. I usually am. Not right now. I am dreading hearing how awesome everyone thinks her boyfriend is though. I don't want to be with him. I don't need to be with anyone. And yet, I'm sure I'll get questions from the extended family about if I'm seeing anyone. Or what I've been up to. Or other meaningless stupid questions to which I have no exciting or interesting answers to give anyone. I wake up, work, and go to bed. It pays the bills and leaves little time for much else.

I wish I could get a do over in life because I'm tired of being the person I am.