Hamhuis Sucks Trade Him Things

I have tons of work to do but I am so frustrated that I need a vent session and this is the only acceptable means right now.

1. I freaking hate you. Get off your high horse and quit with your attitude. If I didn't need my job you would have gotten bitched out 4 times today... and it's only 9:13am. I'm tired of doing extra work because you're too lazy to do anything yourself. Of all people that have made it through the turnovers, how is it that you are still here? As far as I can tell, nobody likes you. They can't stand you. You are a bitch who thinks she's better than everyone else but in reality they all hate you and talk shit about you behind your back.
2. I cannot have a crush on you. It will go nowhere. I've tried putting myself out there but nothing is going to come of it. I've got no chance so why do you keep with the flirty thing? I hate that. Dammit.

I've just flashed back to the movie "He's Just Not That Into You". If a guy likes you, he'll try his damnedest to get with you. I guess that's true of nice guys and dicks, so overall they're the same. My issue comes from me being attracted to the nice guys. The guys who won't hurt your feelings regardless of how they feel (though they'd be with you if they liked you). The guys who lead you on to thinking they do like you. With my low tolerance for pain, I should just be attracted to the dicks. At least when they don't respond or turn you down it's like ripping off a band aid, hurts like hell but it's over quickly. Instead I develop crushes on friends that I know aren't going to go anywhere (because if it was, it would have already). At that point, you're so attached that if it ever does come out in the open and you're really turned down, it's heart wrenching. That hurts like hell for a long long time. I wish that movie had come out a long time ago. I wouldn't have wasted so much time in high school or the following years. I would have had that reality check. That would have been very helpful.

Kariya Things

I've seen where people do this so I'm giving it a shot because most of my thoughts right now are for other people and if I actually said them the shitith would hittith the fan---ith in most circumstances. So here it goes.

1. Stop acting like I can't do my job. I've been teaching myself how to make it work around here for 7 months and have yet to screw up to the point of needing you to fix it. Please trust me... you don't have any reason to not.
2. I know you're trying your best but I miss my old guy. :-( I'm sure it will get better I know that number 1 isn't helping you out at all.
3. Everyone hates their job. It's just how things work. Unless things are completely unbareable you shouldn't quit though. Think about how it's going to affect your life if you do and can't find something else. I wish you'd stop talking about it though.
4. Why are you being such a bitch? I may have never been in love but I can tell that you're the one that's making it where you have to choose. You know all of us will support what you want. You're the one that's making it diffuclt. If you want us to like him, bring him around. By creating this distance you're making us not like him. Stop being a bitch to me and mace and nick and mom and dad. We do the world for you and you can't see past what directly involves you. You're selfish. Get over yourself and your hateful ways.
5. Why can't you be a dick to me? I know when I'm out of someone's league and I'm clearly out of yours. I also know that I'm 100% not your type. I wish you'd be a rude asshole to me instead of the weird flirty thing you do... it'd be much easier to flatten this crush that I'm developing.
6. Quit making more work for everyone else because you're trying to streamline things for you. You waste enough paper to ruin a forest! I can't stand you and still blame you for Gina leaving.
7. What is wrong with you? Why can't you suck it up and be normal and talk to people. You're going to be alone forever if you don't start getting rid of the nerves. Quit being such a freak.
8. Stop sucking! I give you my heart and soul and all you do is crush it whenever you feel like it. Act like you care that I'm giving so much of myself to you.
9. You are my best friends. I love every single one of you. This weekend is going to be utterly amazing and that's the only thing holding me back from saying the above thoughts. I don't care if you guys don't want to sit next to me in St. Louis. I know I'll be fine.