Crushed.

Well, last night sucked. Summer's going to suck. I hate the summer. Screw my birthday, screw vacations, screw having to work when it's 80million degrees outside. Screw it. I need a drink and it's only 8:45am.

It's probably easier and received better if you act like you don't care. I'm not that way though. If something bothers me, it's known. If I'm happy, I'm noticeably happy. If I'm sad, I'm noticeably sad. If I'm pissed off, irritated, depressed, minorly tiddled, whatever, you'll know it. I wear my emotions on the outside so there's no real guessing at my mood. I'm learning that this has and is going to hurt me in life. And that sucks. In the instance of last night, I cared a lot. Everyone knew it. I think it would have been easier if people hadn't though.

Yesterday was a lot more than my happiness coming to an end. Yesterday scared me more than any moment has in years. I sat alone in a bathroom floor for over 30 minutes as tornadoes touched down all around us. From the looks of the damage, we were the center of the big square it seemed to make. It's a sick world we live in. As soon as the storms were gone we had a dent removal company at our shop strategizing the plan of attack. I hope we get a lot of business. I really need the money that would come along with it and staying busy will be good for my sanity... maybe. I just think there's got to be a more kosher way of doing it. If the damage is there and needs to be fixed we should be allowed to fix it (hear that statefarm?) but to be excited that these storms are hitting is just wrong. Hopefully these next few weeks will be busy, as long as the headaches don't continue. They're starting to get pretty bad. What's sad is I know it's from stress. They've got to be b/c come the weekends they're gone. I foresee myself working 45-50 hours a week and then going to bed whenever I get home. Nice way to spend your life huh?

I can't be happy for the Bluesers. I can't. I can't hope for them to win... actually, I'm hoping they lose. Embarrassingly. The BJ's too. I'd prefer the Sharks or Wings to win the cup over them. Hopefully Sutes will play for Team USA in the World Championships so I'll have something to cheer for. I'm sad that that's what it comes down to. I'm also sad because (more likely than not) I'm never going to see Fiddler in a Preds jersey again. That's depressing. I'm done typing. It's all random and is pretty meaningless anyway.